Darkness

We have all experienced suffering. It’s part of life. Even though I sometimes wish things were different, Christians aren’t immune to suffering. Actually, God uses these times to teach us amazing things.

In the past two years, I have personally experienced three major sufferings. The third one is/was so sad/devastating that the first two seem small in comparison. The ones that now seem small include the "almost" loss of a child and a divorce so you can imagine the scope of the third. I’m not yet ready to write about the third. Maybe I will be - someday. Not now.

How do I know that God teaches us things? Because God has a plan. Can I see the full plan today? Nope but I am starting to get some ideas. Honestly, these are all just guesses at this point.


I think God uses challenging times to prepare us for something that we’d never have recognized on our own. Some would view this as a "sick" approach but I don’t think so. Yes, I wish that my family could have avoided all of the pain associated with these three situations BUT I know that we have a good God and He can/will make good out of these circumstances.
The challenge now: It’s on His timeline and not mine.

You:
If you are traveling through one of those dark times, may you see King David's life/offspring as an example. Even when things in his life did not go as desired/planned, God brought good out of the situations. For example, Jesus was a descendent of David & Bathsheba – a relationship that was not started in a healthy manner!

I often wish God would just “fix” the challenging situations in my life but then I remember, He’s teaching me something.

I need to be:
-Patient
-Faithful
-Observant
-Learning
-Action-oriented
-Faithful (I could say that one over and over!)

May you find joy in the cup of sorrow. May you have a fresh perspective filled with authenticity and courageousness.

May you continue to live your life with passion and purpose. It's always about purpose - even in the darkest of days.

(Yes, I know this books is about the women in Jesus' lineage and that most people this week have/will write about a woman's influence. I just felt lead to write about this topic - a very real one in my life right now.)

Summary:
Christians are not promised an easy ride – actually, quite the opposite.
Seek Him (even when you don’t want to!)


Peace be to you.

Influence

Influence:
1. the act or power of producing an effect without apparent force or direct authority
2. the power or capacity of causing an effect in indirect or intangible ways

My question: Are you influencing? OR Is it more like power and control?

I am SO NOT the helpless female type. My mind does not drift towards...if I only had a "man" to help me with... Being "needy" isn't my style. Neither am I powerless to take care of myself. I tend to be pretty "self-sufficient". I am super "single" woman! (hear me roar) Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound...you get the picture.

But wait...it's NOT about the roar...it's all about the purr?
Chapter 9...Why Holler When You can Purr

Having power and contol does NOT create influence! When I look back on the times of influence...it had nothing to do with being "Large & In Charge". Influence lasts...being in control just happens "because I said so". I have been so busy trying to stay on top, keep it together, be in control, or administrate that I have lost sight of the goal...make a difference & influence.

Maybe you've been there, too! I am reminded of the words by a comedian...
"You know what a screamer is....it's someone you don't pay ANY attention to!"

So...how's your influence?
Looking back at our definition...it doesn't say ROAR...it says PURR!

Psalm 25:4-5
Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths;
guide me in your truth and teach me, and my hope is in you all day long.

Unless I sit at the feet of Jesus and soak in His servant heart and ways...I will not have the influence He designed me to have. Come soak in Jesus with me!


JJ

Influential Women Caring for the Poor, Needy, and Dying of Our World

“Injustice prevails; the oppressed have few advocates. God’s purposes are jeopardized everywhere. His dreams for healthy families, faithful marriages, and godly children are in trouble; eighteen thousand children die of hunger daily in a world of plenty; millions of people perish for lack of inexpensive medicines; violence is the parent o the streets; poverty-induced genocide claims innocents; the church has gone dormant.” (Hatmaker pg. 150)

The world hunger problem: Facts, figures and statistics;
*In the Asian, African and Latin American countries, well over 500 million people are living in what the World Bank has called "absolute poverty"
*Every year 15 million children die of hunger
*For the price of one missile, a school full of hungry children could eat lunch every day for 5 years
*Throughout the 1990's more than 100 million children will die from illness and starvation. Those 100 million deaths could be prevented for the price of ten Stealth bombers, or what the world spends on its military in two days!
*The World Health Organization estimates that one-third of the world is well-fed, one-third is under-fed one-third is starving- Since you've entered this site at least 200 people have died of starvation. Over 4 million will die this year.
*One in twelve people worldwide is malnourished, including 160 million children under the age of 5. United Nations Food and Agriculture
*The Indian subcontinent has nearly half the world's hungry people. Africa and the rest of Asia together have approximately 40%, and the remaining hungry people are found in Latin America and other parts of the world. Hunger in Global Economy
*Nearly one in four people, 1.3 billion - a majority of humanity - live on less than $1 per day, while the world's 358 billionaires have assets exceeding the combined annual incomes of countries with 45 percent of the world's people. UNICEF
*3 billion people in the world today struggle to survive on US$2/day.
*In 1994 the Urban Institute in Washington DC estimated that one out of 6 elderly people in the U.S. has an inadequate diet.
*In the U.S. hunger and race are related. In 1991 46% of African-American children were chronically hungry, and 40% of Latino children were chronically hungry compared to 16% of white children.
*The infant mortality rate is closely linked to inadequate nutrition among pregnant women. The U.S. ranks 23rd among industrial nations in infant mortality. African-American infants die at nearly twice the rate of white infants.
*One out of every eight children under the age of twelve in the U.S. goes to bed hungry every night.*Half of all children under five years of age in South Asia and one third of those in sub-Saharan Africa are malnourished.
*In 1997 alone, the lives of at least 300,000 young children were saved by vitamin A supplementation programmes in developing countries.*Malnutrition is implicated in more than half of all child deaths worldwide - a proportion unmatched by any infectious disease since the Black Death
*About 183 million children weigh less than they should for their age
*To satisfy the world's sanitation and food requirements would cost only US$13 billion- what the people of the United States and the European Union spend on perfume each year.
*The assets of the world's three richest men are more than the combined GNP of all the least developed countries on the planet.
*Every 3.6 seconds someone dies of hunger
*It is estimated that some 800 million people in the world suffer from hunger and malnutrition, about 100 times as many as those who actually die from it each year.
(cited/referenced)= http://library.thinkquest.org/C002291/high/present/stats.htm

What happened to taking care of the widowed, orphaned, starving, poor, homeless, sick ? ? ? ? If Jesus were walking on earth today . . . . . I believe He would be caring for/helping/loving on these people; not the nicely dressed church folk in the pews enjoying church in A/C, carpeted rooms, electronics, etc. . . . . . . WWJD with Africa - orphans - starving people/children - dying patients - the helpless; walk by/ignore/pretend they don't exhist? I strongly think nd believe not. Lord; help us to know/have wisdom/discernment on how we can help! Show/help me. I know that if you were walking here with us today you would be pointing us to them - you are pointing me to them - please show me what to do and how and when. It can be overwhelming at times to see the poverty/helplessness around me in my own city/state/country and then to realized there is so much more in the world around me . . . . help me to do something instead of thinking/saying I can't make a difference; I'm just 1 person. With your help Lord; anything is possible.

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has" -Margaret Mead

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrLJ3-mm0fY

Will the Real Bathsheba Please Stand Up

You can call this a twofer...two blogs in one week. Can't beat that with a stick! I realize that this is highly unusual, but I just can't seem to get the story of Bathsheba off my mind. I think that all these years I've had the 'ole girl all wrong. You see every time I heard the story of Bathsheba, she was portrayed as a seductress who used her feminine wiles to attract the attention of a very popular king (ultimately causing his downfall). Bathing naked on the rooftop? Please...like she didn't know she had a peeping Tom. She knew exactly what she was doing...or so I had been led to believe. After reading about Bathsheba in Jen's book, I became intrigued by this woman and her story. I started doing some background research and through the course of this reading, I began to see Bathsheba in a new light. Not as the conniving seductress I always believed her to be, but as a woman of real strength and character. Ok...so now I'm really confused. Who was the woman anyway? Will the real Bathsheba please stand up?!

We are first introduced to Bathsheba during an unfortunate encounter with Kind David. King David was the golden boy who had way too much time on his hands and ended up getting himself caught up in heck of a mess. This is where the blame began to fall on Bathsheba. Surely it was easier for everyone to point fingers at this woman they knew very little about then to admit that their BMOC (Big Man on Campus) was human and messed up. I mean woman are the root of all evil aren't they? The funny thing is that when it was all said and done, David didn't blame Bathsheba for any of it. I found this commentary written by Daniel F. Case
(http://www.case-studies.com/biblestudies/david3.htm)
"David didn't try to shift the blame for his sin. This Psalm doesn't contain one single word of self-justification. David didn't try to blame Bathsheba for his downfall, or talk about the enormous stresses and responsibilities in the life of a great leader. He faced his sin head-on, and called it what it was: his sin. "
In Psalms David says...
4 Against You, You only, I have sinned And done what is evil in Your sight, So that You are justified when You speak And blameless when You judge.
5 Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, And in sin my mother conceived me.
6 Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, And in the hidden part You will make me know wisdom.


So I guess my (rhetorical) question is this....If David didn't blame Bathsheba for his sin....why have we?

This is pretty much where my knowledge of Bathsheba stopped...at this one, not so flattering encounter with David. Besides being the mother of King Solomon I don't remember ever hearing another Bible story about her. What a shame, because the more I read about Bathsheba the more interesting I find her. She was far from perfect, and made plenty of mistakes, but yet God used this woman to do his work.

Watch and Be Utterly Amazed

Bathsheba

In chapter 8 we are introduced to the 4th woman in Jesus' lineage, Bathsheba. For some reason I am fascinated by the story of this woman. Maybe, because (like Amy said) it reads like the plot of a soap opera or maybe it's because her story strikes a chord in me. What a fighter this woman was.  Forced into a sexual affair, pregnant, dishonored, husband killed, son dies.....She took one blow after another and kept getting back up.  I admire that kind of grit. When the rug was pulled out from under her and her whole world came crashing down, Bathsheba didn't throw up her hands and admit defeat.  She stayed strong and God blessed her.  

 

Bad things happen to good people:

What happened to Bathsheba seems like a great injustice, but the truth is that bad things do happen to good people.  Jen says, "How could we carry on Jesus' mission if His people only knew happiness and prosperity?  How could we minister?  How could we possibly understand?  How could we wrap our arms around somebody and say, I've been there, God brought me through?"  

 

My Story:

I've been lucky.  Compared to many, I've led a pretty charmed life.  I've encountered very few bumps along the way.  Guess I thought I was immune from pain and suffering, afterall I am a daughter of the king. But several years ago I went through something that rocked me to my very core.  I never saw it coming, but when it did, it hit me like a ton of bricks and sent me reeling.  At first I was angry with God.   How could he let this happen to me?   I didn't do anything wrong.  I was being punished for someone else's sin.  The pain was so deep and the hurt so real that I wasn't sure I'd survive it. After the intial shock wore off, I knew that I had a choice to make.  I could wallow in a pool of self pity and complain about the injustice of it all or I could pick myself and do something about it.  I chose to fight back. My weapon of choice...my bible. I dug into the scripture like never before. It was my lifeline. The only thing that gave me peace. Eventually, I began to feel God's presence and his healing hand on my life.  Although personally, I was going through hell, spiritually I was beginning to soar.  As I look back now I believe that my priorities were so out of whack that God was using that time to get my attention and to turn my focus back on him. I still have many battle scars that have yet to heal, but I have emerged victorious!  

 

"God's victory over suffering, through suffering, in spite of suffering will be revealed.  Pain is no match for his peace, sin has no authority over His rule.  In our bleakest moments, God's glory shines the brightest.  It's when he can say, "I've been your Savior, but now you will know me as Healer, Restorer, Sustainer" (Jen Hatmaker)

 

I wonder how Bathsheba felt in her time of darkness.  I can imagine that she felt like many of us when faced with similar situations.  Hopeless, abandoned, wondering if the darkness will ever end.  God says in Habakkuk 1:5, "Look at the Nations and watch-and be utterly amazed.  For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe even if you were told."  God restored Bathsheba.  He delivered her out of her suffering and did something utterly amazing!  I bet in the midst of her pain, Bathsheba never imagined that she would one day become the mother of a great King (Solomon) and be known as one of the most influential women of her time.  

 

Maybe your pain is too real now or your hurt to fresh to imagine anything amazing coming from it.  But God tells us to watch...."for those who revere my name, the son of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings.  (Malachi 4:2)

Under the Influence

The story of Bathsheba starts with true heartache - an un-avoidable adulterous affair, an intentional death of her husband, a marriage of convenience, a death of a child. Sounds like next weeks episodes of One Life to Live to me! The Bible is filled with stories of heartache which proves that nobody is exempt from it – even followers of Christ. Like Jen says,
‘If your heart beats, you will suffer. It is part of the human condition. No amounts of “shoulds” will change that. We own corrupted bodies in a corrupted world; we’re plagued with sin, death, and decay; we are born to imperfect parents and have imperfect relationships; everyone gets sick and all of us will die.’
After being Debbie Downer there is good news - God does not allow suffering for no reason(Go God!). It’s hard sometimes to justify why God allows bad things to happen to good people. But think about this – David was a good person. His name is mentioned more than any other man in the Bible, second only to Jesus. He was just plain good people! But he allowed his greatness to go to his head and because of his actions (bedding Bathsheba, trying to “fix” it and when that didn’t work, having the problem killed), God’s punishment was the loss of a son.

Now let’s move on to our next truth from Ms. Understood – Women have the gift of influence.

A woman’s influence has brought us trendy haircuts (think the ‘Rachel’), the right to be treated as equals (Rosa Parks), the permission to wear sleeveless shirts (Michele Obama), the need to purchase expensive shoes (Carrie Bradshaw) and the importance of saying please and thank you (my mother). All women have been influenced both positively and negatively and have also influenced others, with or without being aware.

It’s amazing how our behavior patterns can change under the influence of someone else. I think back in my life on times when I have been influenced by another woman around me. When I visit Nashville I come home with a southern accent and a potty mouth due to the influence of my good friend that makes me feel funny and free. When I watch my hubby play ball I sit and gossip and giggle under the influence of the other softball wives. In college I smoked cigars and ran amuck under the influence of my crazy girlfriends as we found ourselves on our own for the first time.

I should heed Jen’s advice when she tells us,
‘Be certain your influence supports God’s holy standards before you use it or allow anyone else to borrow it.’
I like to think of myself as a not very influenced individual. I march to the beat of my own drummer. Or maybe not so much? If I really think about it, I’m pretty sure I easily let others influence me. The scarier part of this is not being the receiver of influence but being the giver of it. I hope and pray my influence has not been a bad witness to the women in my life and even as I type this I know there are times when it has.

Bathsheba fell in to this trap as well. She started out being influential in a positive way and was able to restore her son Solomon to the throne. But then she was deceived by a kind word from a very sneaky man and tried to use her influence with her own son to do something that would eventually lead to his demise. Thank goodness God was on the side of the righteous and this did not happen. But how many times have you pulled a Bathsheba? Good intentions do not equal positive influence.

Jen says something I have never really thought about but I like it!
‘A woman affects a man’s soul, changing his mind, his direction, his life. Through your gentle advice and godly suggestions, God can rend a man’s heart.’
I was curious so I thought I’d go to the 2 men in my life and ask them what influence I had on them.

My dad's take on my influence as a daughter:
When they are little you can't resist their big brown eyes at bedtime influencing you to tell just one more story.
When they are teens you continue to be influenced to teach them how to drive because you don't want them to get hurt.
When they meet the love of their life they influence you to go along with it even when they are breaking your heart by getting married because you know you can't support them forever.
When they are adult daughters and you are aging their take on life being not all so serious keeps you from becoming a grouchy old person.
When they are mid-life adults and you are trying to figure out the retirement thing and downsizing your life they contribute wisdom in decision making as they advise you not to buy that next too expensive car or another piece of property.
When you have daughters it changes your perspective on the issues of life and you become more gentle wanting to give something back.
When you have a wife and multiple daughters as the only man in the house you are influenced to shop, pick up stuff and clean your act as a man because you sure don't want to dissappoint the women in your life.

My husbands take on my influence as a wife:
She influences me to close the cabinet doors and put down the toilet seat.
She influences me to throw it away if I don't need it.
She influences me to not use the display towels or soaps.
Her influence as a wife encourages me to be a better husband.
Her laid back attitude influences me to work on not taking things so serious (like softball), to turn the other cheek and to remember my own witness.

I feel so loved and happy that my influence has had positive results in the men in my life! I pray I can pay better attention to the power of my own influence and ensure that I am using it only for good and not evil.
This week, think about how you hold up under the influence!!

The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your Lord. - Psalm 45:11

As a freshman in high school,  my then youth pastor shared, "You know,  if you listen to the lies of the world, you'll believe them." This wise council continued, "If you believe you are not thin enough, tall enough, pretty enough, or just not all that... you are telling God his creation is not failing, not even close to perfect." 

He had us then visualize standing in the most beautiful scene we can imagine, filled with God's most incredible creations of nature and then screaming, yelling and ranting and raving - in complete temper tantrum manner - "This is not good enough! Make it better, Make it more like the photographs!"

 (I always picture the spoiled little girl in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory as these images come to mind.)

I recall this message from God every time I visit a dressing room, the scale or the mirror in the morning. Despite my outward appearance, I must believe the God of all creation doesn't make junk! I refuse to be the pot who calls the potter's handiwork imperfect. It's not easy when the world is providing more and more reasons to crave perfection for our outer shell.

So, I won't argue with God's handiwork, but discovering the inner beauty is a daily (sometimes hourly) release of my own intentions to follow Ruth's and ultimately Jesus's example of character.

Author Jen Hatmaker wrote, "Our beauty is patterned after God's; our visual beauty is a reflection of character." So, true beauty means emulating God's character of love.  

Ruth's outer beauty is not evident from all accounts of the Bible however, her inner beauty was discovered in her character. How many times have you heard, "It matters what is on the inside, not the outside?" As much I have heard this, I always thought this was a nice bit of propaganda by my family. Well folks, that is actually.... yes, God's design ... time to believe it and embrace the truth. 

Ruth did not complain, nag or drag her feet about leaving her native Moab, she went eagerly with her mother-in-law Noami to serve because she loved Noami.  Ruth's willingness to live by faith, coupled with courage and devotion allowed her inner beauty to radiate. 

A quick summary:  

A woman's beauty is God's crowning and most perfect creation. This beauty is not for self-serving purposes, but, to serve others as Ruth so embraced as she cared for Naomi enough to leave her own family and country to follow Naomi to a foreign land. She sacrificed and God rewarded.

Don't discount, compare or live in disbelief of the beauty God has blessed you with. He has equally empowered you to cultivate beauty that will radiate and demonstrate your most cherished gift: inner beauty that can change lives.

Back on track: 

Finally, I loved seeing the relationship between Ruth and Boaz as God's perfect plan for selecting a mate. Boaz demonstrates all that a young man should be for a young lady. He was taken with her outer beauty yet, learned all he could about her inner beauty. I love that the Hatmaker clearly explains, "Being tender, available and honest - draws a real man. Ruth conducted herself neither as a seductress or the victim, and Boaz nearly had a coronary trying to get to her. God designed us this way. As much as beauty is mystical, it is also practical; every woman has it, and no man can resist it. God is brilliant. The essence of a woman activates the design of a man. The best in a man is brought out by the best in a woman." 

They completed each other! 

No thanks to Jerry Maguire, just our loving God!

As a mother of two young teens, I believe this love story of Ruth and Boaz is paramount for my daughters understanding the young men that God will bring into their lives someday. 

Ruth and Boaz are examples how God works to bring two people together who are perfect in his plan. Ruth wasn't searching for  a husband, she was serving. Boaz was not searching for a wife, but was faithfully walking in God's favor and living a life of redemption. 

I pray the young men someday my daughters will meet,  will be like Boaz: enamored, a protector, a leader, a faithful follower of God. In the same way, I pray my daughters will see they are precious treasures of God's creation who must daily surrender to his leading and serve others in the same love and kindness that redeemed them in Jesus's sacrifice.

Below is a song I heard in the early part of this week, a perfect song of Ruth: You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do.  So, there could never be a more beautiful you.

More Beautiful You

by Jonny Diaz

Little girl fourteen flipping through a magazine
Says she wants to look that way 
But her hair isn’t straight her body isn’t fake 
And she’s always felt overweight

Well little girl fourteen I wish that you could see 
That beauty is within your heart 
And you were made with such care your skin your body and your hair
Are perfect just the way they are

There could never be a more beautiful you 
Don’t buy the lies disguises and hoops they make you jump through
You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do 
So there could never be a more beautiful you

Little girl twenty-one the things that you’ve already done
Anything to get ahead 
And you say you’ve got a man but he’s got another plan 
Only wants what you will do instead

Well little girl twenty-one you never thought that this would come 
You starve yourself to play the part 
But I can promise you there’s a man whose love is true
And he’ll treat you like the jewel you are

So turn around you’re not too far 
To back away be who you are
To change your path go another way
It’s not too late you can be saved
If you feel depressed with past regrets
The shameful nights hope to forget
Can disappear they can all be washed away
By the one who’s strong can right your wrongs
Can rid your fears dry all your tears
And change the way you look at this big world
He will take your dark distorted view
And with His light He will show you truth 
And again you’ll see through the eyes of a little girl