If I wasn’t too old to be punished by my mama, I’d be walking around with a bar of soap in my mouth 24/7. Let’s just say I have a serious case of potty mouth! I will say I have tried to tame it down these last few years but it is hard. Sometimes the only thing I can say that gets my point across is a dirty one! Come on, you know what I mean…you’ve done it too.
I grew up with a very foul-mouthed Grandfather who used GD like it was his job. I NEVER use that word…must be my good Baptist upbringing! But I did learn quite a bit from him and developed my own bad habit. When I was younger, I knew when to use the bad words and when not to. At home my parents found it somewhat amusing when I threw it in conversation as a joke. I NEVER cussed in public being the daughter of a preacher and all. But then when I was out in the world on my own, it became a habit that I no longer hid and it got out of control.
In church yesterday we sang an old favorite of mine…Thy Word. The lyrics of this song are a perfect reminder of why it is necessary to be careful with our choices of words and language.
Thy word is a lamp unto my feet
And a light unto my path
If the Bible is our guide, here is what it says about our language:
Ephesians 5:4 – ‘Dirty stories, foul talk and coarse jokes-these are not for you. Instead remind each other of God’s goodness and be thankful’
Exodus 20:7 – ‘You shall not use the name of Jehovah your God irreverently, nor use it to swear to a falsehood. You will not escape punishment if you do.’
Colossians 3:8 – ‘But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.’
Proverbs 13:3 – ‘He who guards his lips guards his soul, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin.’
Colossians 4:6 – ‘Let your conversations be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.’
1 Timothy 4:12 – ‘Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”
Not only is what we believe reflected in what we say, but our manner of speech will influence others. Choose your words carefully. I’m getting better at it and this is a great reminder!
Monday, July 13, 2009
FOUL!!
Monday, June 22, 2009
Fortune Teller
I cannot remember thinking much about the future as a kid - other than the usual dreams of young teenage girls - the big wedding and super hot husband and 2.5 kids. When I got to college I switched majors 5-6 times before I finally landed on Spanish, but only because it allowed me to spend a summer in Spain and graduate in 3 ½ years. After earning a Bachelor of Arts I went on to my own version of graduate school – the Ambassador Institute of Travel.
I have been a corporate travel agent for 14 years now. But – I have a dream – that one day I will be a writer. I don’t have goals to go along with that dream because I’m a tad on the lazy side and don’t set goals. I could wrap it all up neatly in a pretty little box with a pink polka-dot bow but the bottom line is - I lack ambition!!! I wish there was a magic pill I could take to jumpstart my brain into this because I have plenty of ideas and thoughts running through my crazy brain, just no desire to follow through.
Can you imagine a world were nobody follows through on dreams and nobody sets goals? Think of all the good stuff that would be missing from this world…Facebook, Tivo, Blackberrys, Chipotle, a black President, a woman’s right to vote, equality, democracy, freedom of religion…infinite stuff!!
“I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game’s winning shot…and missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
Does it surprise you to know that this is a quote by Michael Jordan? You think of Michael and you do not think failure, but for all of his success he has had his fair share of failure as well.
I eat a lot of Chinese food – so much in fact at one particular restaurant that the owner cooks special meals for my husband and I. A meal is never complete though without the fortune cookie. My husband is never very interested in opening his but he caves under my urging.
I am very superstitious about it too – someone cannot give you the cookie, you have to choose one so you are in charge of your own destiny. Never ever eat the cookie. First of all I think they are gross, secondly if you eat it the fortune will not come true.
One time I got a cookie with no fortune – so I ate the nasty cookie so my blank fortune would not come true. I have also had a couple of repeats and a couple that are just a bunch of crap and not really a fortune.
By far though my favorite I’ve had said ‘Reach for your dreams. Start with the spring rolls.’ No joke. Can’t decide what that one means!!
Do I really think someday I might find the answer to all of my dreams and goals inside a fortune cookie? Not really – I trust God will lead me in the right direction. And who knows, he spoke to Moses through a burning bush so maybe he’ll communicate to me via a cookie!!
**We are leaving for our mission trip to Moldova June 20 and will be back July 1. We bought lots of presents for our friends over there and will be taking 2 suitcases full of goodies for them.**
Monday, June 15, 2009
No Strings Attached
My favorite alone time with God is during my walks in my neighborhood. I take along my Ipod and listen to some great praise music and totally get lost in my surroundings. During one of my walks, I was praying and asking God to really help me not be such a judgmental person. Then I saw a lady smoking on the front porch of the house I was passing and she had a toddler in a stroller. ‘What a bad mother!’ I thought to myself and then immediately I felt God yelling at me – “HELLO!!! Didn’t you just ask for help with this, and then in the next breath there you go - already passing judgment!”.
For the next mile it was all I could think about.
Why do I feel it is my responsibility to judge?
Where does that come from?
I don’t like when others judge me…why can’t I stop doing it?
Then something in my path caught my eye – an orange string. I picked it up and tied it around my wrist – the orange was bright so maybe this would help me remember! Also someone might ask me why I wear it and then I have an opportunity to share it with them. You know the whole red string for Kabbalah totally took off – why not my orange string for no judgment?
In theory this sounded great but wouldn’t you know…I lost the bracelet immediately. I went to bed with it on and when I woke up it was gone. I didn’t really look hard for it because I knew it was probably just under the bed, but it was an accountability I still wasn’t ready for.
A few weeks passed and I couldn’t get the orange string out of my mind. Then on a walk with family in a totally different part of my neighborhood, I came across another strand of the same orange string! What are the odds? It was almost as if someone had once again dropped it right in my path! Duh!?! When God wants to get your attention, He gets it.
I still don’t wear the string…I’m just not ready. I can’t explain this – it seems a little strange when I type it – but I just can’t bring myself to face this sin. I keep it on a table in my bedroom and see it every time I walk in the room. It makes me mindful but I’m not committing yet.
I guess I’m still a work in progress!
Monday, June 8, 2009
Spot On
Growing up my family sat down for dinner together every night at 5pm. My father would ask my sister or I to pray, and it really didn’t matter which one did because we both always prayed the same prayer.
“Dear God thank you for this food and our family and please help every one who is sick and in the hospital.”
It’s a wonder my dad never said anything about it because I’m pretty sure it wasn’t altogether that sincere.
God communicates with us through the Bible and the Holy Spirit. We communicate with God through prayer. Prayer is not only helpful, it’s necessary. If you had a friend that kept reaching out to you and you never did so in return, odds are you will not be friends for very long. You will not know them and they will not know you. It isn’t any different with God.
Romans 12:12 says to be constant in prayer.
Matthew 9:38 says pray earnestly.
First Thessalonians 5:17 says pray without ceasing.
I tend to think of prayer as a formality. It is a big mistake to pray this way and I find when I fall in to this trap, I am not being very sincere. Prayer should be personal and intentional. It is also something we should not take lightly. Have you ever had a friend tell you something and you have responded “I will be praying for you”, knowing full well you have no intention of doing it? I find myself doing this often and it is so irresponsible of me.
I have to admit prayer is one thing I’m not all too comfortable with. I have a very hard time with it. I find it hard to focus and not let my mind wander to other things during prayer. If I’m by myself, prayer can all too quickly turn in to a mental to do list. If I’m in a group, I tend to focus on what I am going to pray when it’s my turn and by doing so I am not listening to the prayers of others.
Once as an adult I was asked to pray prior to a meal with family. We were all having lunch and then going to the Fiesta Bowl Parade in downtown Phoenix. About half way through the prayer I started to get tongue tied and felt stupid with what I was saying, so I ended my prayer with, “And dear God, please don’t let any balloon characters get out of control and take us out in the crowd.” Everyone laughed and I felt redeemed. In reality, I made a mockery out of my prayer and therefore out of God. There is a fine line between humorous prayers and humorous praying.
The other day I was at my parent’s house and my dad disappeared into the garage. He was out there for a while and I started to get worried thinking maybe he fell or something. I asked my mom if we should check on him and she said no, that he goes out there a lot just to pray. He just needed a little alone time with God and so he went to his spot where he could focus and pray intentionally. I think this is a great idea. Since then, I have taken to spending my prayer time on my front porch swing. It’s a cozy and semi-private spot and as I sit on the swing, it’s like God is there with me.
Here are some great quotes I found regarding prayer:
“Some people pray just to pray and some people pray to know God”
“There is a mighty difference between saying prayers and praying.”
“Wishing will never be a substitute for prayer”
“Is prayer your steering wheel or your spare tire?”
“When I pray, coincidences happen, and when I don’t pray, they don’t.”
“Pray and let God worry.”
“Courage is fear that has said its prayers.”
Find a spot you can share with God this week and have a converstation. Do it often and make it count! Have a great week!!
**At the Dollar store I was in line with 30 items and there were long lines. The lady behind me had 3 items so I let her go in front of me. Small but kind.**
Monday, May 25, 2009
Table for 2 please!
The Bible is clear on idol worship - don't do it! An idol is not necessarily a person or a figure. It can be a habit, an idea or a way of life. It can be your spouse, a parent, a sibling or even a child. Bottom line - it is anything you place before God.
I love journals. The problem is when I buy a new one I cannot bring myself to write in it because I don't want to mess it up...so, most of them remain blank. The same is true about Idols - they look so pretty on the outside and you find yourself collecting them without realizing it, but then you open them and realize they are empty on the inside. There is no substance, only surface level satisfaction. The only fulfilling idol you can have is God.
While reading my Bible in preperation for this week, I was led to one of my favorite books, 1 Corinthians. Chapter 10 is titled 'Warning against Idolatry'. For those of you who think you do not need a lesson on the danger of idolatry - think again! I'm sure God is putting up yellow warning tape all around your dream world as we speak. Why? Check out chapter 10, verse 21, which caught my attention because it explained my personal dealings with idolatry.
"You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons. You cannot partake of the table of the Lord and the table of demons."
I often find myself unable to pry my hand away from the cup of demons. Of course I think I am getting cozy with God but it's a false comfort because I am really not putting Him first. My table is littered with cups. What are in my cups of demons? To name a few...
Celebrity Gossip
My husband
Secular ideology
My Blackberry
Facebook
Money
Material possessions
Sometimes I find myself knee deep in idol worship before I recognize it for what it is!
Have you ever wanted to try to cleanly pull a tablecloth out from under a set table? Imagine God is the tablecloth and you have a bunch of stuff just sitting on top of Him. Pull the cloth and walkaway from the mess. You are holding on to the only thing that matters.
Take a look at your cup and your table. Recognize what is taking priority over God in your life, walk away from the table of demons and have a seat for 2 with God at his table.
Monday, May 18, 2009
The Big Kiss-off!
When you are a kid, it’s easy to make friends. Picture yourself on the playground – you spot a new girl – she comes over to you and says “I like your shoes!” You reply, “I like your barrettes! Want to go play on the swings?” You join hands and skip away without a care in the world, just you and your instant BFF.
As an adult it’s just not that simple, or so I’ve found. Lives change, priorities change, people change. It’s hard to make time to invest in yourself yet alone others. It's more about quality and not so much quanity.
Back in the Spring of 1994, I was just back from a college semester abroad in London and feeling very cosmopolitan and hip and yet a little out of the loop. My best friend and roommate had moved in to an off campus 1 bedroom apartment – great for parties. At one of the first parties, the un-thinkable happens – I violated rule #1 – a hook up with my best friends crush. I got caught kissing the boy, get kicked out, the friendship was over.
My best memories from college revolve around this friend who surely would have been a bridesmaid in my wedding. The boys name was Bubba. I lost my best friend for kissing a boy named Bubba. How dumb could I be? Knowing I was in the wrong I tried to make it right but to no avail. We never spoke after that night.
Now fast forward to the present…thanks to Facebook my former best friend contacted me and we restored our friendship. This Wednesday we get to see each other for the first time in 15 years!! We are meeting for a girls only night at the Opryland hotel and will probably stay up all night catching up – I cannot wait! She cannot wait!! We both cannot believe we haven’t spoken in so long because of a silly boy named Bubba!!
You might have your own version of this story to tell. Friendship is hard – you have to commit time and energy to make it work.
Proverbs 27:6
‘Faithful are the wounds of a friend, profuse are the kisses of an enemy.’
What does this mean? I left wounds in my friend by betraying her trust. Sometimes wounds from a faithful friend come from telling the truth instead of sugar coating. A true friend is someone who isn’t afraid to deal with the hard and ugly things as well as the good. Isn’t this what Christ does for us? He doesn’t always tell us what we want to hear but rather what we need to hear. I would rather have this kind of friendship with my Savior, who is capable of healing my wounds, then kisses from the enemy because I know no matter how desirable those kisses seem at the time, just like the kisses with Bubba. In the end it will lead us to sin, be eternally destroyed and banished infinitely in hell.
My husband and I are in Nashville this week for my sister-in-law's high school graduation. I think back to my graduation and can remember someone sang Michael W Smith's song 'Friends are Friends Forever' at the ceremony. The chorus goes like this:
And friends are friends forever,
if the Lord's a Lord of them
And a friend will not say never
cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Fathers hand we know
That a lifetimes not too long to live as friends
At the time, I just saw the song as an anthem for my teen angst. High school was over and we were all headed in different directions, but according to the song, we'd always remain friends. Now I see that the song is actually encouraging me to nurture and appreciate meaningful relationships, to develop a few close friends and build those relationships for a lifetime.
You know the saying if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck then it must be a duck? Think about friends you have had throughout your lifetime where your behavior patterns have changed based on who you surround yourself with. It is true we are the company we keep. The most important characteristic a friend should have is the love of Christ in them - so it's time to give Satan the big kiss-off and remember...friends are friends forever, if the Lords THE LORD of them!
(My fortune cookie today read 'The time is right to make new friends'. You think God is trying to tell me something?)
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
The Rebel with a Cause
Spiritual maturity can be viewed two ways when it comes to age - either you’re too young to have it or you’re too old not to have it. Personally I have found neither option to be true.
Looking back on my own life, my spiritual maturity has changed based on how much I’m feeding myself with God’s word. I was really involved in my youth group as a teenager and as a result of that, I possessed more spiritual maturity during my teen years than I did in my twenties. Now I feel like my maturity grows stronger as I continue to seek and obey God. It requires change and it is an ongoing process but the reward far outweighs the struggle.
Obviously with what God placed on the very young shoulders of Mary, there is no age requirement to obtain spiritual maturity. God does not place a sign out that says, “If you were born after May 13, 1999 then you are officially spiritually mature”. It is based solely on you and your relationship with God. Draw near to him and you mature. Pull away and you don’t. It’s as simple as that!
As Christians we place a lot of stereotypes on others and by doing this we judge their spiritual maturity. Jen says in Chapter 10 – ‘God constantly blows the doors off our stereotypes ….No one is more unconventional than God. Funny how His name is used to create boundaries when, in fact, He is the Ultimate Rebel. Frankly, I’m shocked when He uses anyone slightly normal, whatever that is.”
I love that God is a rebel – and that he uses abnormal people because I have that going for me! And I’m pretty sure it really ticks off Satan to hear God described as a Rebel and to see him cozying up to the bad guys, because if anyone can flip a bad seed good, it’s God! Satan is probably saying “Back off my people – I got them locked up!” See that is the thing with God…nobody is excluded from His grace which means anyone can come in to spiritual maturity no matter what their past is. God is a rebel with a cause - and that cause is YOU!
I really enjoyed reading about Jen’s friends in Chapter 12 – wow what amazing women. I’m kind of feeling like a slacker! Makes me realize I could do so much more than what I do for God. I do however have something awesome coming up so I’ve decided to be totally selfish here and ask for your help. For the past 2 summers I have had the opportunity to participate in a mission trip with my church to Moldova, the smallest and poorest Eastern European country. On June 20 I will be headed back there with another group of adults to help lead a sports camp for teenagers. We have a very small group going this year – just 4 of us – and we really need your prayer! So if you can start praying now for God to be with us in planning, preparation, in the willingness of the kids to attend, for the Moldovan leadership as they put the camp together, for our safety in travel and for us to be spiritually mature and share God’s love with these kids – it would be greatly appreciated!!
I’ll leave you with a picture of me and my girls Karina, Nadia and Maria, and my husband Devlyn and Karina's brother Dan, some of the awesome teenagers in Moldova that I have formed a very special bonds with. Thanks for your prayers!!
Monday, May 11, 2009
Jesus I'm your mother!
Our last woman in the lineage of Christ – Mary! We are going out with a bang on this one – she’s Jesus’ freaking mother - you can’t get any closer than that!! Everyone knows who Mary is. But does everyone know how young she was when this huge responsibility was placed in her lap? The answer is 13. Thinking back to myself at 13 and how I would feel if I was told I would be giving birth to the Savior let’s just say…I’d be totally freaked out! I just started shaving my legs and didn’t even know about shaving my armpits and you’re telling me I’m going to have a baby? And he will be called Jesus? And oh yeah – he’s pretty much the Son of God. Awkward!
I’d be pretty glad if I was Mary that the song ‘Mary Did You Know’ did not come out until way after the fact because it would have freaked me out even more. The lyrics go…
Mary did you know…your baby boy will some day walk on water / will save our sons and daughters / has come to make you new / the child you have delivered will soon deliver you / will give sight to a blind man / will calm a storm with his hand / has walked where angels trod / when you’ve kissed your little boy you’ve kissed the face of God / is Lord of all creation / will one day rule the nations / is heaven’s perfect lamb / the sleeping child you’re holding is the great I am.
People talk about Kate Gosselin being a super mom – well she had nothing on Mary!! TLC would be all over this one – I can see the show now – they'd call it ‘Oh Jesus I’m Your Mom’ – starring Mary and Joseph and Jesus Christ as Himself!
As we’ve all heard many times, age is just a number. As of today, I am 429 months and 3 days old. Sounds like a strange way to say I’m 35. I think it is funny when you ask a mother how old her child is, she will tell you in months. Now I can understand doing this when they are under 1, because months are all they have. But when they turn 1, just say 1 people! Also when you’re young, you give ½ years…I’m 11 and a half. That half is important. To this day, I still acknowledge my half birthday. I was under the impression everyone did but apparently I’m one of the few.
I think you pretty much stop telling and people stop asking your age around 30. Personally I don’t care, it is what it is, but some people have real hang ups when it comes to age. Thank goodness God doesn’t!
Our last truth – women are favored by God. Hooray for us girls!! Now I personally know what it means to be favored. We have a joke in my family that I’m the favorite child and I have to admit – for me, it’s kind of fun. Or it's fun to at least pretend that I am because I know my parents truly do not favor me over my sister.
Now having the favor of God does come with a bit of responsibility. It’s not automatic. You can’t have favor with someone who you don’t even know. If you have a relationship with God and you remain faithful - you will remain in His favor. Jen gives the example of Peter and feeding the sheep. This is one of my favorite stories of the Bible. I have a close relationship with my dad and since I was young I have asked him, “Dad – do you love me?”
He will say yes and I will respond “Feed my sheep”.
Sometimes he answers yes I’ll feed your sheep because he knows the drill. I try to catch him not thinking about it and get him to just say yes so I can say the feed my sheep part.
It’s funny because it is the same way with God. If I am close to Him and He asks if I love him, I’ll say yes and I will feed your sheep. But if I stray away and get off track when he comes to me with this question I simply say yes. Then he has to remind me to feed his sheep.
Feed His sheep ladies - remain in His favor!!
I’m so sad this book has come to an end! I loved the book and would recommend if you haven’t already read it, you need to!! One last story for you...
When I was little I wore my underwear backwards for so long that when my mother tried to get me to stop, it just didn’t feel right wearing them correctly.
This is kind of how I feel in life lately. I think I know myself and my capabilities but everything I know about myself is just like my underwear – backwards!
After reading about these 5 great women – Tamar, Rahab, Ruth Bathsheba and Mary – I see some of the same great stuff in myself. I too thought I was too powerless (Tamar), too tainted (Rahab), too inferior (Ruth), too broken (Bathsheba) and too young (Mary). Now I know I am smart, brave, beautiful, influential and Godly – how cool is that?! I got my panties on the right way and it feels good!!
Monday, May 4, 2009
Under the Influence
The story of Bathsheba starts with true heartache - an un-avoidable adulterous affair, an intentional death of her husband, a marriage of convenience, a death of a child. Sounds like next weeks episodes of One Life to Live to me! The Bible is filled with stories of heartache which proves that nobody is exempt from it – even followers of Christ. Like Jen says,
‘If your heart beats, you will suffer. It is part of the human condition. No amounts of “shoulds” will change that. We own corrupted bodies in a corrupted world; we’re plagued with sin, death, and decay; we are born to imperfect parents and have imperfect relationships; everyone gets sick and all of us will die.’
After being Debbie Downer there is good news - God does not allow suffering for no reason(Go God!). It’s hard sometimes to justify why God allows bad things to happen to good people. But think about this – David was a good person. His name is mentioned more than any other man in the Bible, second only to Jesus. He was just plain good people! But he allowed his greatness to go to his head and because of his actions (bedding Bathsheba, trying to “fix” it and when that didn’t work, having the problem killed), God’s punishment was the loss of a son.
Now let’s move on to our next truth from Ms. Understood – Women have the gift of influence.
A woman’s influence has brought us trendy haircuts (think the ‘Rachel’), the right to be treated as equals (Rosa Parks), the permission to wear sleeveless shirts (Michele Obama), the need to purchase expensive shoes (Carrie Bradshaw) and the importance of saying please and thank you (my mother). All women have been influenced both positively and negatively and have also influenced others, with or without being aware.
It’s amazing how our behavior patterns can change under the influence of someone else. I think back in my life on times when I have been influenced by another woman around me. When I visit Nashville I come home with a southern accent and a potty mouth due to the influence of my good friend that makes me feel funny and free. When I watch my hubby play ball I sit and gossip and giggle under the influence of the other softball wives. In college I smoked cigars and ran amuck under the influence of my crazy girlfriends as we found ourselves on our own for the first time.
I should heed Jen’s advice when she tells us,
‘Be certain your influence supports God’s holy standards before you use it or allow anyone else to borrow it.’
I like to think of myself as a not very influenced individual. I march to the beat of my own drummer. Or maybe not so much? If I really think about it, I’m pretty sure I easily let others influence me. The scarier part of this is not being the receiver of influence but being the giver of it. I hope and pray my influence has not been a bad witness to the women in my life and even as I type this I know there are times when it has.
Bathsheba fell in to this trap as well. She started out being influential in a positive way and was able to restore her son Solomon to the throne. But then she was deceived by a kind word from a very sneaky man and tried to use her influence with her own son to do something that would eventually lead to his demise. Thank goodness God was on the side of the righteous and this did not happen. But how many times have you pulled a Bathsheba? Good intentions do not equal positive influence.
Jen says something I have never really thought about but I like it!
‘A woman affects a man’s soul, changing his mind, his direction, his life. Through your gentle advice and godly suggestions, God can rend a man’s heart.’
I was curious so I thought I’d go to the 2 men in my life and ask them what influence I had on them.
My dad's take on my influence as a daughter:
When they are little you can't resist their big brown eyes at bedtime influencing you to tell just one more story.
When they are teens you continue to be influenced to teach them how to drive because you don't want them to get hurt.
When they meet the love of their life they influence you to go along with it even when they are breaking your heart by getting married because you know you can't support them forever.
When they are adult daughters and you are aging their take on life being not all so serious keeps you from becoming a grouchy old person.
When they are mid-life adults and you are trying to figure out the retirement thing and downsizing your life they contribute wisdom in decision making as they advise you not to buy that next too expensive car or another piece of property.
When you have daughters it changes your perspective on the issues of life and you become more gentle wanting to give something back.
When you have a wife and multiple daughters as the only man in the house you are influenced to shop, pick up stuff and clean your act as a man because you sure don't want to dissappoint the women in your life.
My husbands take on my influence as a wife:
She influences me to close the cabinet doors and put down the toilet seat.
She influences me to throw it away if I don't need it.
She influences me to not use the display towels or soaps.
Her influence as a wife encourages me to be a better husband.
Her laid back attitude influences me to work on not taking things so serious (like softball), to turn the other cheek and to remember my own witness.
I feel so loved and happy that my influence has had positive results in the men in my life! I pray I can pay better attention to the power of my own influence and ensure that I am using it only for good and not evil.
This week, think about how you hold up under the influence!!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Are you an "Inie" or an "Outie"?
‘You don’t love a woman because she is beautiful - she is beautiful because you love her.’
What an amazing quote! And it completely encompassed the essence of Ruth. After reading this week, I realized although Jen’s ‘Truth’ in chapter 7 is ‘Women are beautiful’, the Biblical book of Ruth never speaks of her physical appearance. Her beauty came from her inner being and because of that you can’t help but love her.
Ruth was:
Steadfast
Loving
Obedient
Industrious
Generous
Loyal
Humble
Grateful
Worthy
Redeemed
Rescued
Blessed
Ruth is a Proverbs 31 woman!! The list of words to describe her ‘Beauty’ could go on forever - she was the real deal! When was the last time you got ready for a night out and didn’t concentrate on your outer beauty, but rather focused on how your inner beauty could shine through? Anyone can bedazzle themselves in to looking good for appearances sake, but can you bedazzle others to see the glow from the inside that is so strong they don’t even consider your outer beauty when describing you?
Remember – Proverbs 31:30 says, ‘Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.’ I would say Ruth was in fear of the Lord because when she left for an unknown land instead of returning to her homeland, she knew exactly what she was doing – following God.
So what are you - an Inie or an Outie? May your inner beauty shine through just like Ruth!
Monday, April 27, 2009
(T)Ruth and Beauty
As I was reading this week I took my bookmark out at Chapter 6 and laughed. Here is a picture of what is on my bookmark.
How they share their love.
Monday, April 20, 2009
The Fear Which Project
I never thought I would be cheering on a prostitute in the Bible but go Rahab! Could I have been so brave to defy a King? Probably not - and unlike Rahab, I have the knowledge of God's power and love! I'd probably just stick my 'No Soliciters' sign on the door and be done with it.
Our family has a secret doorbell ring to alert each other it is us at the door so it's okay to answer it. I'd tell you what it was but then I'd have to invite you in. Wow! Is this how we prepare to answer when God knocks? And He does knock, just ask Rahab!
Fear is a tough one. We all have fears - here are a few of mine:
Moths
Scuba Diving
Turbulence
Hair Balls
Confrontation
Loss
The unknown
Being alone
Death
You see how my fears went from nonsense to seriousness so quickly? Fear is unrational. As Christians, fear is unnecessary!! The opposite of fear is faith.
The chapter title of Hebrews 11 is 'By Faith'. Verse 31 says:
'By faith Rahab the prostitute did not perish with those who were disobedient because she had given a friendly welcome to the spies'
'Don't be Afraid' is the most frequent command in the Bible. There are specifically 2 types of fear in the Bible. Think of it as the 'Fear Which Project'. One is detrimental and the other is encouraged. Which do you have? Hopefully it is the encouraged fear of the Lord. Can you imagine living with no fear?
As I'm writing this post, Matt Redman's song 'Never Let Go' is playing over and over again in my mind. It honestly sums it all up way better than I can. The lyrics say:
Even though I walk, through the valley, of the shadow of death - Your perfect love is casting out fear - And even when I'm caught - in the middle - of the storms of this life - I won't turn back I know you are near - And I will fear no evil - For my God is with me - and if my God is with me - Whom then shall I fear? - Whom then shall I fear?
There are a lot of brave women in the Bible. I just finished the Beth Moore Esther study and if you haven't done this already it is a must. Talk about a brave woman - Esther stood up to fear and came out on top. All in God's plan of course. With God on your side, who could be against you? Next time a killer moth flies right at me, I hope I remember to call on God to cast away my fear!
Have a fearless week!
Monday, April 13, 2009
Ms. Understood? Get Smart!
I Y the title of this book! All women think they are Ms. Understood. But ask yourself this...
God - who do YOU say I am?
Identity in Christ is really all the understanding you need.
Men vs. women; the battle of the sexes; girls rule, guys drool; we've all led a cheer at some point in our life to take a stand for our gender. But how about a new cheer?
GIVE ME AN E ! GIVE ME A Q ! GIVE ME A U - A - L !!
Not only are we created as equals, we are equally blessed by God. How awesome is that?!
When I was young I wanted to play 2nd base for the St. Louis Cardinals. In my mind I was convinced it was possible. Obviously this lofty goal I set for myself did not come to fruition! I didn't give up, I simply understood it wasn't in the cards (no pun intended). I mean, God gives us grace, but he didn't exactly give me grace, if you know what I mean! I used to play coed softball with my husband and decided it just wasn't for me when I made all 3 outs in one inning for our team! I was the best player the other team had!
Jen says in her book, 'Unique from each other yet set together, we are mankind. We are gifted differently but our power is in our union'. While men and women are equal, it does not mean we are the same.
A perfect example: I love giving cards for special occasions. I mean, cards are just fun to look at and you know how exciting it is when you find the perfect card for someone? I think this is a woman thing because guys just don't care! No really - trust me - they don't! I have given many a perfect card to my husband's guy friends and I'm still waiting on a reaction, from ALL of them. I've been told over and over again by my husband that I'm wasting my time - and our money - but I keep doing it. Now if I gave a perfect card to a girl friend, she would proudly put it on display, show it to all her friends and have a hard time throwing it away.
When I think of Tamar, there would have been several opportunities for me to spend time picking out a perfect card for her. She went through so much! I could give her mulitple sympathy cards going through the death of 2 husbands, some good girlfriend cards she would need for a good laugh after dealing with her father-in-law, and finally a congratulations card on the birth of her twin sons.
Ah Tamar - now that's one smart cookie! A little harlot perhaps, but smart! Theoretically (stressing this word!), I know I've been where she was. I've been used and gone through mourning. I can wear black with the best of them. But, I can pull myself out of that mourning and live again.
Was I always this way? HECK no! As I've grown as a woman, I find all kinds of strength and street smarts I definitely did NOT possess as a teenager or young adult. I used to think it was cute to be dumb. The dumb blondes got all of the attention from the boys so why not just play dumb? I mean, it wasn't Andrea Zuckerman that the guys were in to, it was Donna Martin and Kelly Taylor (Julie - the 90210 reference was for you!). There was a girl in my youth group who was a dumb blonde. Once in Sunday School she was asked to read scripture out loud and she said, "Do not covet your neighbors....butt?!?" She didn't want to say ass - as in donkey - which she obviously did not get. But everyone laughed and in my mind, it got her lots of dates.
Let me end by saying - women - the stupidest thing you can do is dumb yourself down!!! My husband thinks I am smart and he digs that about me too. God made women to be smart and He entrusted them and their smarts throughout His word. We all have God-given, built-in common sense, let's start putting it to better use!! If Tamar hadn't, a piece of the lineage of Jesus would be missing!
Monday, April 6, 2009
Be still - you might miss it!
A few years ago around easter my husband accidentally hit a bunny that ran in front of our car. I told my nieces that their uncle had run over the Easter Bunny. My youngest niece looked up at me all wide-eyed in disbelief and said, "Uncle Devlyn killed the guy at the mall?!"
Ah - the joys of commercialized holidays! To most people Easter represents the following:
1. 1 of 2 times they attend church during the year
2. Purchasing of a new dress and hat to look our "Easter Sunday best".
3. Coloring, hiding and hunting eggs.
4. The Easter bunny leaving us gifts in hidden baskets.
5. Chocolate bunnies and Peeps!
We should all be focusing on the true meaning of Easter, the Resurrection!! Because He died and rose again. The tomb was empty, the promise was fulfilled. This week try and allow the power of the Resurrection to consume you from the inside out.
I will be focusing on Psalm 46:10 - 'Be still and know that I am God'. How simple and easy is that? Be still. Or replace 'be still' in the verse with the things in your life that distract you from doing this:
Cease striving and know that I am God.
Quit crying and know that I am God.
Quit judging and know that I am God.
Slow down and know that I am God.
It's hard to hear what someone is saying if you aren't listening. You might think you are listening, but are you really being still?
I was inside a gas station this past week and was so involved in making my cappuccino that I almost missed a call. I was humming along to the music they were playing in the store and thinking - wow! They are playing a Christian song in here...how cool is that? Then I realized it was my own cell phone and my husband was calling from the car to see what was taking so long.
Have you ever been so wrapped up in something that you can't see the forest for the trees? God has been calling and you recongnize it yet you don't answer?
Exodus 15:26 says 'Diligently listen to the voice of the Lord your God, do that which is right in His eyes, give ear to His commandments and keep all His statutes.'
Diligently listen...how many times do you think God has tried to get your attention and you just don't get the hint. We expect communication with God to come in the form of a loud resounding voice and a bright light but it's not a movie people. And if we are not diligently listening, can we be sure we are following His will for our lives?
We all have questions we want answered. I know I am waiting on several things from God. But am I paying attention to what He's already told me? I'm hardly ever just still, listening to God. I have so many opportunities like when I'm in my car for 45 minutes. I should spend the time diligently listening and seeking God and instead I'm listening to the radio or my Ipod and talking on the phone.
During a Beth Moore study, she mentioned the reason it was the women that found the empty tomb is because God knew they would spread the word. We can be known for good gossip too!
So this is your oppurtunity to spread the news. This week be taken with the word of God and revel in it. Be still and listen. Then spread the word. As Christians the week of the passover is our Superbowl. Let's increase the hype - Christ the Lord has risen!! Can I get a witness?
Monday, March 30, 2009
KTN - Weapons of mass destruction?
When I was a kid my sister and I had a Frenemy – our neighbor Shelly. We befriended her in the summer because she had a pool. But as soon as summer was over she became ‘Fat Shelly’ and we sang ‘Lard Butt’ to her – a very cruel song we made up. (I’m sure you all want to be my friend now!) . Suffice to say, someone wasn’t listening to the story of the Good Samaritan in Sunday School!! It’s sad to say it even carried over to adulthood as it is now a family joke - when we are all together eating we say ‘Wonder what Fat Shelly is doing?” And then in unison we reply, “Eating!!’. We all pretty much assume Shelly is a supermodel now too – serves us right!!
Have you seen the movie Mean Girls? An exclusive clique of girls were called ‘The Plastics’ because they were very fake and very cruel. They were the type of girls who would compliment you to your face and then diss you behind your back. They kept a burn book that listed very unkind, untrue and unnecessary information about their classmates.
We have all been a ‘Plastic’ at some point in our life and I’m sure we have all been a ‘Fat Shelly’ too. In reading the many verses in the Bible on KTN, there was one that stuck out to me. Colossians 4:6 says – ‘Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.’
There are 3 different ways we should use words according to this verse –
1. Words of Grace – How many of us have been personally relieved by His graciousness and yet are slow to extend the same graciousness to others? Read it again, then really answer this question - you might be surprised.
2. Words that are salty – Our speech should be so seasoned by grace that it will not be rejected with aversion. Salt is a peservative, it enhances the flavor of the food and makes us thirsty!
3. Words that are consistent – Our speech should be consistent with the Word of God and the character of Christ. Bottom line, Christ is our best example of how to apply KTN!
Kindness in us meets needs in others.
Not being truthful hurts.
Unnecessary words are weapons.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Purely Statistical!
The word ‘purity’ only appears in the Bible in 5 verses, and ‘impurity’ appears in 15 verses. The context for both is usually related to sexual sins.
When we decided to write about purity for this blog, I immediately knew the topic I wanted to discuss – pornography addiction. A quick Google search later blew the lid off my naïve way of thinking on this topic. I was amazed at the statistics I found and how large of an epidemic addiction to porn has become. I have personally known marriages that have been destroyed by this and let me tell you, nobody is immune. Satan plays on weakness and this stuff is so easy to access and highly addictive.’
Test your knowledge with these statistics:
1. Porn revenue is higher than revenue earned from:
A. NFL (National Football League)
B. MLB (Major League Baseball)
C. NBA (National Basketball Association)
D. All of the above
Matthew 5:8 – Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
The answer is D – porn revenue is higher than the revenue earned from the NFL, MLB and NBA combined!!
2. What percentage of Promise Keepers attendees viewed porn within a week prior to the event?
Proverbs 30:12 – There are those who are pure in their own eyes but are not cleansed of their filth.
The answer is 53%!
3. 20% of Christians say pornography is a major problem in the home – True or False?
1 Timothy 5:22 – Do not be hasty in the laying on of hands, nor take part in the sins of others; keep yourself pure.
The answer is FALSE – the correct answer is higher – 47% say it is a problem in the home.
4. What percentage of all women struggle with pornography addiction?
A. 4%
B. 10%
C. 13%
D. 17%
James 4:8 – Come near to God and He will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.
The answer is D – 17%. This is not just a male epidemic, women struggle as well.
Other statistics for you…there are 4.2 million pornographic websites (12% of total websites); the daily pornographic search engine requests is 68 million (25% of total search engine requests); worldwide visitors to pornographic websites is 72 million annually; 37% of pastors admit to an ongoing struggle with pornography; 1 out of 3 visitors to adult websites are women.
**Statistics derived from a combination of reputable sources**
My husband and I have a few safeguards in place so we do not fall in to this trap. We have installed an accountability software that will email both of us when a pornographic site is accessed from any of our computers. My husband also has a male accountability partner that he checks in with and who also receives alert emails. Find your own safeguards but do something - doing nothing is allowing an open door for Satan to walk right through!
My favorite verse about purity in the Bible is Philippians 4:8 – ‘Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is PURE, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.’
I tend to use ‘Whatever’ as a response when I don’t want to deal with something. To remain focused, I have replaced the ‘whatever’ in this verse with my own personal struggle. That way I can name it – be specific – and own it! I challenge you this week to take this verse and make it your own too!
My actions are true
My words are honorable
My intentions are just
My thoughts are pure
My personality is lovely
My attitude is commendable
My relationship with Christ is excellence
My God is worthy of praise
I will live according to these things.
Free to be me......
Monday, March 16, 2009
Buy the Bible
Unfortunately Thrifty Tam has always told me I have expensive taste. After a conversation with a friend on how much is too much to spend on a purse and me declaring I would never go over $50, this cute green bag called out to me and no sooner had I thrown down the purse price gauntlet did I find myself purchasing said green bag for $70!! So now officially I will not pay more than $70 for a purse, unless something in the $80 range catches my eye…or $90? $100? Oh my!
I love to shop and I am a perfector of the impulse buy. I reason with myself in my own head at stores and can usually justify buying most things, you know, with “Amy” logic. I never met a Target I didn’t like and feel it is my duty as their #1 shopper to purchase items on a weekly basis. My favorite book is ‘Confessions of a Shopaholic’. Hello, my name is Amy and I throw caution to the wind and shop like it is my job.
So what would God say about my obsession? I am pretty sure I don’t take him with me on my shopping sprees. He might be with me, but I sure can ignore the heck out of Him. So what can I do about my obsession? I could blow it off and live by the motto – ‘Life is short, buy the shoes!’, OR I could follow the more biblical motto – ‘You can’t take it with you when you go!’.
“But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.” (1 Timothy 6:6–8)
I wrote this verse on a note card and put it up all over my house. I even clipped it to the strap of my cute green purse! Now every day this week I will be reminded to be content with God and not earthly possessions.
Now don’t get me wrong, I have been known to be a little thrifty myself. I mean you can’t live with Thrifty Tam for 18 years and not pick up on some things. If you catch me on a good day, you might see me putting back that impulse buy and actually leaving a Target with nothing more than what I came in with! I have also taken a drink in to a sit down restaurant and when I’m paying the bill, I realize it’s not such a mortifying idea. I often have stores do price adjustments and think of Thrifty Tam and how proud she would be. This is really a great idea, just pay attention to the Sunday ads because a lot of stores will adjust prices due to a sale for up to 2 weeks after you originally purchased the item.
Now Thrifty Tam has no idea how to turn on a computer, but I bet if she did, she would be all over on line coupons. If you are purchasing something online, they always ask if you have a special offer code. To get these codes all you have to do is Google the item and store and you can find working and valid codes that = big savings!! I do this all the time and it works like a charm.
My favorite thrifty date night is me and my hubby surrounded by books and magazines at the local bookstore. You don’t have to spend a dime, unless you can’t resist the cappuccino at the café. But even still, you can read magazines for free and play footsy under the table with your man – who can ask for a better date?!?
Here is a picture of me and Thrifty Tam last year...the yummy dessert was free because it was her birthday!!
Free to be me...
Monday, March 9, 2009
I'm digging it!
In the mid-eighties when I was 12 my family moved in to a newly constructed house. My grandfather bought a Ginkgo tree for us to plant in our front yard. I agreed to help my dad plant the tree thinking it would be fun. Now let me preface this by saying my dad’s idea of help was for me to dig the hole while he gave instruction from the front porch as he was sipping a glass of ice cold lemonade. He “supervised” while I dug and dug, and then dug some more. I kept asking if it was enough and he kept telling me to keep digging. Finally after the hole was so deep you could not even see the top of my head if I was standing in it, my dad’s friend drove by and asked what I was digging. We proudly showed him the tree ready to be planted and his reply was, “When do you want that thing to come up – 1999?”
Needless to say, the hole was way too deep – but why am I telling you this and what the heck does it have to do with Proverbs 31? A modern day woman has many pressures – being every thing to every one, not knowing when to say enough is enough – you all know what I mean and are probably thinking of all the things you have to do right now rather than finish reading this post! We are literally digging ourselves deeper and deeper away from what is really important. We continue to ask if we are finished and another distraction will pop up and we are once again digging away. Don’t you think God is wondering when you have time for Him – or even for yourself?
Women are nurturers by nature but at the same time we are over committers. We can go, go, go with the best of them but that's not necessarily a good thing. I am only responsible for myself and my husband and yet my agenda is packed for weeks - I don't even want to imagine what it would be like if I had a child to take care of!
Recently I asked a friend to have lunch but she was busy. What about dinner – nope, she had plans. Morning coffee? No time. I could see her hole getting deeper and deeper.
The Proverbs 31 woman is busy, but her personality profile ends with the fact that she feared the Lord. Surely this means she doesn’t dig her hole so deep that her growth is stunted and it takes forever for her true beauty to be seen above the surface? She manages her time and probably has used the word 'No' once or twice. We all need to try that once in a while. At the end of the day – do you climb out of the hole, step over all the dirt and put down your shovel to join God on the porch for some lemonade?
I know this is all makes a nice story but in reality, we all have responsiblities and others counting on us so it's not as easy as it sounds. Here's the thing - we could all use a break from the realities of life but WE are the only ones standing in our way.
I'll leave you with this story on my favorite topic - shopping! I really love to shop but my husband can't stand it. If I take him to the store with me we have to practice in the car - what are you getting - do you have the list? Let's go right to it - get in and get out! As soon as I walk in the doors I lose my mind and start looking at other things that were not at all a part of the original plan. He firmly places a hand on my shoulder and guides me back to reality. Focus, he'll tell me. Hmmm...sounds an awful lot like what God would do to us if we let Him. Feel His hand on your shoulder this week gently guiding you and urging you to maintain focus.
Free to be me...
Monday, March 2, 2009
The Proverbs 31 Super Woman
After reading Proverbs 31:10-31 I feel like I am one sandwich short of a picnic. I know this passage of scripture is important because it is talking to me, a woman, and is saying how I am to live my life, It also comes straight from God’s word. The Proverbs 31 woman is like the Jennifer Anniston of the entertaiment industry – everyone woman wants to be her and every man wants to be with her. I mean I can get the Rachel haircut, but can I get encompass the spirit of her personality?
But how am I supposed to live up to this ideal woman when I can’t grasp what the verses are saying? Seeking wool and flax, making bed coverings, not eating the bread of idleness – does this apply to me? Can I get flax at Target? I can’t sew and I have no idea if I eat bread that is idle – I eat a lot of bread and I'm ususally eating it while being idle on my couch so does this count? After a little research and a quick prayer for clarity, I started to break this passage down.
I started at the beginning again and this time I didn’t get any farther than the first verse.
Proverbs 31:10 reads ‘An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.’
Wow - now this takes me back to the best piece of advice I ever received as a teenage girl.
It started out with a crush. We were both juniors, I was in high school and he was in college. After a few weeks of knowing him, he stopped by to see me at work and introduced me to his FIANCEE!! I was bummed to say the least, but once I knew dating him was off the table, I really started paying attention to the advice and encouragement he had been giving me all along. His motive was purely to help me grow in Christ and although I don’t even remember his name, the one simple thing he told me still sticks in my mind today.
“Every man is looking for a Godly woman”
Excellent wife – more precious than jewels – are you following me people? (Ok now I’m just copying Beth Moore!!)
Hmmm, a Godly woman. Ok, my dad is a pastor…it’s in my blood to be a Godly woman right? Yeah we all know what they say about pasors kids though.
These words followed me everywhere - the rest of high school, college and my single working years after college. Every man I dated I knew was not the one because they were definitely not looking for a Godly woman!! When I finally met my husband at of all places, a club called The Lava Lounge, being a Godly woman had been placed on the back burner. I was 23 and all my friends were married and starting families after having earned their MRS in college. A night out with friends from work turned in to a God given chance encounter with a man who actually was looking for a Godly woman! And of all places at a dark night club with lamps glowing with neon lava!! He was playing the part of wing man that night for his best friend. I was playing the part of girl who did not know which direction she was headed. The Bible tells stories of God using the weak and let me tell you, I had the T-shirt!! I had no direction and a million wrong paths facing me. I had made choices I knew were wrong – nothing major – but definitely not along the path of the righteous. And then God blessed me with a Godly man who to this day encourages me to be a Godly woman - a Proverbs 31 woman. (Who apparently likes to shop just like me, but we’ll get in to that next week).
I would encourage you to read Proverbs 31 for what it is but don’t be discouraged by it. I’m a music lover and I love when a song comes around with powerful lyrics that just say it all. The song that describes the essence of who I am in it’s title ‘Free to be Me’ by Francesca Battistelli also sums up how I felt when faced with living up to the Proverbs 31 woman.
The lyrics say:
Got a couple bumps in my fender, I’ve got a couple rips in my jeans,
Trying to put the pieces together, perfection is my enemy
On my own I’m so clumsy, but on your shoulders I can see
I’m free to be me
Don’t try to be a Proverbs 31 woman in one week, it is something you should strive to be throughout your lifetime.
Thanks for reading!
